SEO Speak Translated: The Real SEO Glossary

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In the SEO industry agencies, experts and even bloggers have adopted a special mode of speech not to say

slang that might be misunderstood by outsiders

like clients, website visitors or the general public. To help you understand what search engine optimization experts really mean I devised this real glossary of SEO speak:

We offer Search Engine Optimization/SEO = We assume you are the Google bot and want you to index this page for both keywords
We offer Search Engine Optimisation = Our SEO company is based in the UK
Guaranteed top positions = We place Google Adwords for you
We do SEO, SEM, PPC to increase your ROI = We do not want you to know what we do
We stick to the Google Webmaster Guidelines = We only break them in a way that we assume Google won’t notice
We tell you how to make money online = We want you to click on our ads
10 ways of making money online = Those are our 10 affiliates, please click on the respective undisclosed ads
We offer social media marketing = We buy Facebook ads for you
We offer link baiting services = We want to put those drunk naked ladies video on your site
Our network = Our link farm
Authority sites = Sites that do no SEO
Black hat SEO = We do anything to get rich quick, even if your site gets banned
White hat SEO = We only cheat Google where we have to, others do it too, come on!
We optimize for Google, Yahoo, Bing, Ask = If we fail on Google you still have to pay
Search Engine Submission = We need your mail address, those guys offered us $$$ for each 1000 verified addresses
Partners = People we never heard of until we exchanged links
PageRank optimization = Sorry, we just started doing SEO and do not have a clue
SEO India = We offer 1000 links for 30$
Alexa optimization = All our employees have the Alexa Toolbar installed, it really works!
We offer content, inbound or digital marketing – We’re ashamed of practicing SEO