Internal Google Rules Governing the Corporation

A man holds his hands over his face in front of trees at sunset. He may be hiding or just desperate.

Imagine your business depends on a black box corporation like Google! What then?

You have to learn to read between the lines.

Thus I prepared an unofficial list of rules that govern the corporation.

You may not hear about them in the news or read about them in the latest press release.

Yet this is how Google works behind the scenes.

Secret Rules? Are You Kidding Me?

OK then. How secret is secret?

Is this some kind of practical joke?

Well. Not really. It’s not about secrets in the CIA sense.

These are open secrets. You only have to open your eyes to notice.

Believe me, I’ve witnessed it over the years more often than I would have liked to.

Following the news about Google is often truly frustrating.

The list covers mainly three topics: ethics, privacy, website optimization and Google panalties.

I added some links where the rules might need some context to grasp them.

1. Do no evil, unless money is at stake and nobody watches. When someone watches do it anyway. We have enough unpaid tax money to pay for penalties.
2. Don’t like our corporation? You can always use these other competitors’ services who are much worse.
3. Come on, your computer, iPhone and your sneakers are Made in China too so what’s the problem with Google China?
4. We do not censor, we just remove questionable material others asked us to remove, especially with dirty words like “anal sex” and “democracy“.
5. We’re not a monopoly, you always can use a different product even though we dominate the market, move along punk!

6. The friendly brother is watching you – we only use your data for your own good! You get better ads.
7. The more free Google services you use the less free you are. You are trapped within our filter bubble!
8. Google has got your data and we respect the local laws, so if the police calls… we will of course obey the law. When it hurts our business we won’t btw.
9. We own your Google documents, didn’t you know? Read the ToS next time. 
10. We know everything about your website and we’ll tell the competition.

Website optimization
11. The more you try to fulfill Google’s wishes on your website the less it’ll work in the long run
12. Once you managed to gain a good position in Google’s results Google will change something and you drop back down
13. To abide by Google’s webmaster guidelines you need to watch them closely, they might change any day
14. Website optimization techniques which were perfectly legitimate once will be spam in the future
15. If you ask us how to optimize for Google we will reply that great content is it, even if you already have great content

Google penalties
16. The more you conform to Google demands on your website the more clutter
17. Writing for Google is writing for robots
18. Any way of gaining links for a better Google ranking is artificial and once we find out we will clamp down on it
19. What big corporations are allowed to you are not
20. You can’t call Google once you have been kicked out of the Index, unless you’re the BMW manager
21. Paid links are only paid if you receive the money directly and tell others about it and they don’t point to Google sites or our partners
22. We’re patriotic, you won’t rank high in the USA if your site is from India

I assume this list of hitherto unwritten Google rules is not complete!

Some aspects beyond ethics, privacy, website optimization and Google penalties are not covered at all.

Thus in case you work at Google and know the rest of them make sure to add them in the comments.

Your name will remain strictly confidential. I have Proton Mail for whistle blowers! Just write to onreact at

You can copy this article and spread it but please do it with an attribution and a link to this page.

The truth about Google must be uncovered!