Have you ever read the Cornwall SEO blog? Me neither. Cornwall SEO Lyndon Antcliff aka Lyndoman offers just 19 reasons why you should not read his SEO blog. I can easily surpass that!
Therefore I offer you not twice as many reasons not to read my SEO blog, I offer you three times as many reasons to ignore this SEO blog altogether! 57 reasons not to read my SEO 2.0 blog:
- My English is bad, as I’m a Pole living in Germany
- I use no pictures, watch out or such search engine spiders (picture above) will get you!
- I rank #1 in Google for SEO bullshit
- I rank #1 in Google for Fuck SEO
- I think about asking for a job at the Google anti-Spam team
- I never visited a SEO conference like Lyndoman because I assume that I know more than the speakers
- I wear a ridiculous sombrero on my avatar image
- It’s not even me on that picture
- I blog for fun not for cash
- I offended Rand Fishkin at least twice
- Nobody links to me besides the people that link to me anyway
- I poke fun at SEO
- I hate SEO thus only practice SEO 2.0
- I’m Mad Tad, the SEO destroyer
- I will take away your clients while you’re asleep
- I love Iran!
- I rank in the top 10 in Google for “I hate Digg“
- I dismiss Reddit as full of haters
- I fight haters
- I dismiss StumbleUpon as dead
- I do not even optimize my own SEO blog for any useful keyphrase, like SEO blog e.g.
- I use offensive language like “bullshit, fuck” in the first place
- I let people flatter me in the comments although I know they only want a link
- I offer free website reviews just to lure visitors and then need weeks to write them
- I dismiss black hat SEOs along with SEO haters
- I rank above you for best SEO company (your country)
- I will beat John Chow, Rand Fishkin and Matt Cutts
- I will make you lose your job after people realize that in SEO 2.0 they do not need conventional SEO
- I am an egoist, always beginning sentences with “I”
- I can tell you 30 reasons why you should not read my blog
- I will steal someone’s idea and make it twice as good
- I am the best SEO blogger on the planet and look down on you
- I am 33 years old and still not rich and famous
- I will kick your ass, been flaming for ten years on the net
- I never met Angelina Jolie
- I do not even drive a car because I spend all my money on organic food
- My blog has more visitors than yours although it’s only 6 weeks old
- I do not respect authorities
- My posts have no dates
- Life is too short to read SEO blogs anyway
- I’m funnier than you and your crew!
- I use dirty blogging tricks you never even heard of
- I am too lazy to create my own WordPress theme
- I am big in China, Russia, Iran and other rogue states (enemies of the US)
- I can outrank you out of the blue if you annoy me
- I never wore a tie in my entire life
- I am not a business man and I do no marketing
- I invent new terms that nobody else uses
- I translate German idioms into English
- I do no link exchange if you ask me to
- I am too cool to buy links while you spend hundreds of $$$ for them
- I do not check my blog’s PageRank and I laugh off those who do
- I do not even depend on Google for my traffic
- I have no ads on my blog, maybe the CIA pays me?
- I am a populist
- I am arrogant to the core
- I suck!
Where are you now Lyndoman?! You have to admit: You can’t compete with Mad Tad, the SEO destroyer! Admit it! Come on! Or I will outrank you!
Last updated: June 30th, 2017.