7 Completely Insane Black Hat SEO 2.0 Techniques
Most average people assume that SEO is bullshit, evil and spam.
Maybe it’s even a sexually transmitted disease! Who am I to disagree?
A poet? Why not ride the wave instead? Why not go black hat?
Wearing a Black Hat Like a Social SEO
Thus I came up with seven completely insane black hat SEO 2.0 techniques for an increasingly mad world.
SEO 2.0 or social SEO as most people refer to it is about getting noticed, admired and mentioned.
It can also be unethical or black hat though when you do things for publicity that you would not tell your mom about.
How can you rise above the noise level? Sometimes you have to be even louder.
Of course all the 7 completely insane black hat SEO 2.0 techniques here are no joke and totally
- crazy
- idiotic
- unlawful
They will make the US army annihilate your block as an “Al Qaeda stronghold” so use them at your own risk.
- Sell ad space on your behind especially if you are a sexy blogging geek model
- Make up a completely crazy story and make all the major global media report it
- Give away your a-list blog for free, go to the woods to write and refuse to pay taxes
- Provoke a spontaneous human self-combustion of yourself and put it on YouTube
- Sue Google! Or even better, sue Google, Facebook, Amazon and Apple at once!
- Stalk Kim Kardashian [or insert your favorite celebrity here] and then let her bodyguards beat you up in front of cameras
- Jump off a capsule in the stratosphere without dying while at it and make sure to document everything
Btw. did I tell you that most of these SEO 2.0 publicity stunts have been successfully performed already? Do you know which ones? Can you guess?
In any case: these are excellent link magnets. You will not only get your 15 minutes of fame type of publicity but also inbound links to your site.
Use Your Own Wings to Fly
Of course you don’t have to be that outrageous. Small time black hat SEO 2.0 is always possible. You can’t jump off the stratosphere? Jump down from the tallest building in the world (no suicide please). You can also find a local bridge LOL.
Red Bull finances, organizes and publishes content about all kinds of jumps all the time and people love it!
They have more than 14 million links to their site according to SEMrush! Few of those refer to actual soft drinks.
Just make sure not just to post your photos and videos on third party sites like YouTube, Instagram. Publish the best content on your own properties to get the actual link love!
One of my most popular Pinterest pins with tens of thousands of shares (or saves as they call it) is an image from the Red Bull site showing some freerunners idly chilling in front of a landmark. Only one of them even jumps (while having a ridiculous haircut).
So whatever you do, use your own wings. Fly your own way.
Do something spectacular, outrageous or insane the way you would do it. Only that way you create something truly unique others haven’t before you in the exact same way. Don’t just parrot the other examples above!
I would suggest:
8. Make your best friend totally drunk, do nr.1 and then let him do nr. 5 and 6, so that nr. 2 happens….
Perhaps I could talk my boss into spontaneous combustion!
All good (yet) crazy media grabbing ideas.
Those are totally insane ideas! Thanks for the post. :)
Yeah, Karsten and Jake, try that and report the outcomes! ;-)
“Land Projects UK”: You repeteadly ignored my commenting guidelines. Next time your comment gets erased. I changed your “name” accordingly.
[…] first but then a follower of mine suggested something crazy. This inspired me to write the 7 Completely Insane Black Hat SEO 2.0 Methods yesterday10. Blackmailing innocent usersIt might sound weird but I have a slight psychological […]
#6 sounds like the most fun!
#2 was tried by Lyndon Antcliff very recently and did that story ever go viral:
http://www.cornwallseo.com/search/index.php/2008/05/16/dude-wheres-the-mental-post-gone/
#1, 2, 3 and 5, I believe. I know that #1 is at least being tried out, and #3 I think just happened. #2 sounds like it happened. I certainly hope it’s not #7.
Resent Trends shows just what you mentioned..what about number (4) rule?? can you explain it in detail?
jonson: I’m afraid #7 was performed in 2001 as an “art” publicity stunt:
http://www.seanbaby.com/news/cow.htm
sunnydhabhai: #4 is partly satire partly taken from a movie where a writer sets himself on fire to gain publicity for a new book. Basically it’s about doing something completely crazy to gain attention. Simple self-immolation or burning yourself does not work anymore, as this anti-war protest shows:
http://www.truthout.org/article/war-protestors-public-suicide-chicago-unnoticed-media
Of course this post is satirical so I do not encourage anybody to do that.
You can do something crazy without harming yourself or others.
I am going to sue google for de-indexing all of my ebay stores – then maybe they will get traffic again :)
Ive tried the cow drop, but unfortunately my cow really just doesnt like flying and throws a tantrum everytime we bring the helicopter out.